small life

I don't like September. It's one of those months that has a bad reputation--the beginning of the school year, the end of summer--just like Mondays.

If we got rid of September and Mondays (as in, eliminated them. I don't know where they'd go. Check with the missing socks and the last original plot), I wonder if it would make people happier. Sure, maybe the psychological effects would last for a week or so, but then we'd move on to hating October and Tuesdays.

I was reading a blog post over at Book Bound (which is just fabulous, and really entertaining) where they talked about finishing your first drafts. What they said, though much more eloquently than me, was that you should finish all your first drafts. You don't have to publish them of course, but you'll learn so much that, trunk them or not, it'll be worth it.

Soooo, I'm back to my novel about super heroes. Novel might be a stretch--it's 12 pages and counting... Slowly counting... I'm just rereading what I already had, and I'm not stuck yet, but I'm afraid I soon will be.

So: September, Monday, writer's block. What else do I extremely dislike?

Canteloupe, shrimp, basketball. Swallowing so much salt water your throat burns. Incoherent blog posts. Grey's Anatomy. The fact that not everyone's life can be an Urban Fantasy novel.

In other news, have a great Friday.

Erika

sicksicksick

Hello,

The band, Port O'Brien, has a song called I Woke Up Today (weirdly enough, O'Brien is my gym teacher's name. Coincidence? I think not). It's a pretty good song, in my opinion. They're a folkish band who, according to their website, have been heavily influenced by the ocean.

If it was written about my life, though, I fear the song would go more like, I woke up today... and then I went back to bed.

I stayed home from school today because my head felt like someone had chosen it as the convenient location to blow up and twist around party balloons. This marks my First Cold of Fall. Wow, only six days into it and I'm sick. Pretty impressive, really.

Yesterday, I was outside in the pouring rain for about three hours because my town had it's first ever Graffiti Fest. There are a few big, abandoned buildings around town, and during the Graffiti Fest, the Arts Council and Skeena Diversity Society got permission to completely spray-paint over one of them. I left my mark on a concrete road barrier that was off to the side of the building.

Here I am, with my finished work:


Ugh, lovely rain-soaked hair and I-wasn't-planning-on-leaving-the-house clothes. So, I painted "Je t'aime" (I love you in French). Then it pretty much washed away in the rain, so painted it again.

At least being sick has given me lots of reading time. I finished Paranormalcy yesterday and The Demon's Lexicon today. Now I'm torn: I Am Number Four or Clockwork Angel? It's so hard to say.

So, what are you doing today?

lovely

Helloooo,

So, it's been raining. And if you read this blog regularly, you probably know that I adore the rain. I write weird, incoherent posts dedicated to storm clouds. I jump in puddles, and I sleep under layers of quilts to soften the plink-plonk of rain.

Tragically, I haven't been able to fully enjoy the miserable weather because I've been working. In the past three days, I worked nineteen hours. And I bought two books. Ah, well, what better way is there to spend my wages? I got a copy of I Am Number Four, so I'm pretty stoked to read that--okay, I was practically jumping up and down in front of the customers, and there was definitely some giggling :)

All this exciting news. Or maybe it's not very exciting for you. I apologize.

Tonight, I will fall asleep to the roar of the rain. Tomorrow, I will sleep in far too late and spend the day doing homework and practicing for a trumpet-playing-test.

But I will not let it spoil the lovely weather.

Love,

Erika

never be the same

(Image from weheartit.com)

My friend, Hope (name change, just in case she doesn't want it here), moved away at the end of the summer.

It's nice, talking to her over MSN, hearing about her day and her school. But it's also weird--removed. Hope is one of those rare, wonderful people who are totally fearless and totally vulnerable at the same time. She was always up for anything; a loud, vibrant person. Except when she wasn't. Hope could be shy and awkward just as much as the rest of us. But she could make anyone feel comfortable with just a few words.

She's coming back to Terrace in a few days (13 days, 14 nights, she told me), and I'm excited, but I'm also worried about what might have changed.

Hope has always kind of overwhelmed me. She's so bright and alive and crazy, and I definitely wish I could be more like her. As much as I want to talk to her in person again, I'm a little worried.

She and one of her good friends have a bet going that Hope will star in a movie before her friend publishes a book. They're the kind of people that will still be in touch in, say, twenty years. Me? I'm not so sure.

I'm sure I'll still know at least a few of my close friends. I really can't be sure, though. I definitely want to know what all these fabulous people will do with their lives, but once we're no longer seeing each other in school every day, I don't know if we'll really remember.

There I go, getting all nostalgic over things that haven't happened yet.

One thing's for sure, though. I don't want to forget. The evening air is cool and crisp, and we have our fireplace lit. It's the perfect first day of Fall.

This is a season of courage.

Erika

SPEAK up

I read Speak when I was in grade eight, and it made me sign up for Art the next year. It made me value my words, and the power they carry, that much more. It made me think before I spoke.


For those of you who haven't read Speak by Laurie Halse Anderson, it's a book about a girl named Melinda Sordino who begins her freshman year refusing to say anything, due to a trauma explained later in the book. Spoilers below, please scroll down quickly if you don't want to read them!

*Spoilers*

Melinda got drunk at a party a few weeks before freshman year, and was raped by senior Andy Evans. She calls 911 and cops bust the party--once the school year starts, she is alienated by all her old friends, and because she doesn't tell anyone what really happened, she falls into a deep depression.

Melinda spends most of her time in art class, or holed up in an abandoned janitor's closet she claims as her own, not saying a word to anyone. When her friend Rachel starts dating Andy Evans, though, Melinda feels obligated to tell her about the rape.

*End spoilers*

It's a very emotional, moving book that deals with all sorts of feelings of isolation, guilt and depression. I think it should be a definite must-read for all teenagers and adults. But apparently not everyone feels the same way.

Enter a man named Wesley Scroggins. He's both associate professor of management at Missouri State University and was a speaker at Reclaiming Missouri for Christ. I don't have anything against his religious beliefs, but I do have something against him calling Speak filthy and immoral. He called it soft porn, because it has two rape scenes.

1) The idea of sex itself is in no way the main point of the book.
2) How is rape soft porn? That part really disgusts me.

My main argument, however, is against the idea that kids and teens shouldn't be reading books like Speak because they can't handle them. Rape is a topic that teens need to know about, and keeping it out of the school system won't stop it from happening. As Veronica Roth said in her brilliant post on the subject: The world is broken. No matter how much time you spend covering your eyes, and covering your children's eyes, the world will still be broken when you uncover them., you can't shelter your kids forever. In my mind, sure, a seven-year-old probably shouldn't be reading Speak. But teenagers always read above their level, and reading about the horrible, ugly parts of the world help us to better understand the good as well as the bad. Just because you read a mystery novel about a psychopath doesn't mean you're going to go out and kill a dozen people.

Reading is just as much about what you take away from the book as what the book actually says. And reading a book like Speak definitely helped me better understand my classmates, and my world.

For a much more coherent piece on the subject, check out Laurie Halse Anderson's website here.

I don't think you have to give your kids, or the young people you know, free reign to read anything they want. Obviously some books are inappropriate until the ready is "ready". But you can't shield their eyes forever, and reading is all about choice. Who do I want to be today, what do I want to learn about today, what do I need to know?

Everything.

Love,

Erika

hug o' war

Every Saturday, we try to change things up at The Bookstore (capital letters just so you don't confuse it with a bookstore--a simple, run-of-the-mill place I don't work at). This isn't really that exciting. We change the mini-displays so there are new books up, and write a new quote.

These are both my jobs. And I love them.

I love exploring the fiction section (which I'm not allowed to hang out in too much, since I know it so well already) and finding new and exciting titles. I love picking out covers that make me go oooh! and putting them out for everyone to see.

But most of all, I love writing a new quote. It's pretty simple: you pick out a quote, poem, or saying you love, write it on the store's big white board, and put it out for display. The quote can be about books, or something that makes you think, or something that makes you laugh. You can pick anything, and that's why I was so freaked out when, last Saturday, it officially became my job.

I didn't know where to start or what to expect. Would my boss be okay with what I picked? Would anyone actually be able to read my writing?

This was today's pick:

Hug O' War by Shel Silverstein

I will not play at tug o' war.
I'd rather play at hug o' war,
Where everyone hugs
Instead of tugs,
Where everyone giggles,
And rolls on the rug,
Where everyone kisses,
And everyone grins,
And everyone cuddles,
And everyone wins.

It made me happy, and my boss was happy, and today was a good day. Some days you go with something that puts a smile on your face, and that's all.

Love,

Erika

simplicity is confusing

George Frideric Handel was a genius.

We're playing his piece, Sarabande, in concert band and it is fantastic. Our arrangement is really simple, but really, really beautiful. If you've never heard it, check it out right here.

I think that the simple things are often the most beautiful. I know that's not exactly an original idea--everyone's always saying, "Enjoy the simple things in life!"--but right now I feel the undeniable truth in it so strongly that I wanted to share. Like Handel's piece (although I'm sure a lot went in to writing it) a few notes strung together can say more than a whole orchestra. And don't get me started on Ode to Joy.

But some things can't be simple.

My favorite part of a horror movie has always been the beginning, when everyone is going about their normal lives, with no sign of the gruesome murder or deadly monsters to come. The tension is building, but no one is spurting blood.

I think that's a bad sign. How can you be a writer, how can you thrive off creating problems and obstacles for characters to overcome, when you breathe a sigh of relief when nothing is going wrong?

But now, I've come to an understanding. There's nothing wrong with enjoying a little down time. That being said, I need to know how to wreak some havoc, and toss in a few violins. Or trumpets. I do adore trumpets.

I'm sorry, I think I went off on about fifty different tangents right there.

Have a terrific Tuesday,

Erika

flight of the fifteen-year-old

Hello Saturday,

It's been a busy day. I worked for seven hours, all the while with a massive inferiority complex hovering over my head. Then I did stuff. Not sure what, but it took two hours. How do I know that? I didn't eat dinner till 8:00. I do not operate well on an empty stomach.

Earlier in the week, my science teacher was discussing study habits. He mentioned making goals, and, even though you could practically hear the class rolling their eyes, he had some interesting things to say.

According to my teacher, all sorts of studies have been done on written goals--not just goals in general, they have to be written down. If you have specific, detailed goals and you write them down, you're way more likely to achieve them.

That got my thinking.

Counting September, I have four months until I turn 16. I've decided there are a few things I want to do in these four months--I know sixteen isn't very old, but it's old to me. Which means that 800 years old is like, unimaginable ;)

While I am Fifteen, I will:

1. Attend a new yoga class
2. Complete at least two PE by correspondence assignments (out of five, I think)
3. Have the rough draft of my wip COMPLETE
4. Have an A average in all my classes
5. Practice cello and trumpet every other day
6. Go swimming

There. They're little things, but now that they're written down, there's nothing to stop me from achieving my goals :D

Oooh, I just love tagging things.

Erika

random post is random

I'm watching The Vampire Diaries, which I've just recently discovered I kind of love. At first, I pretty much ruled it out. Just another vampire story, right?

In many ways, yes. Human girl falls in love with vamp guy. But it has so much more--awesome dialogue, some serious violence, totally hot actors (what? It's true, visual aids do help), and vampires that are legitimately scary. They snarl, their faces go all black, and they kill each other. What more could you ask from a vampire?

Basically, you shouldn't judge a book by it's cover--or a TV show by it's main paranormal feature...? Yeah, no, don't even pay attention to that.

In other news, I was on Bing.com (just to look at the pictures, I swear. I'm a Google girl at heart) earlier and saw this, the pangolin:

Do you know that awkward moment, when characters on a TV show or movie are kissing, having a serious make-out session, or *fading to black*, and someone else is watching the show with you? Yeah, my dad's in the kitchen, and I'm watching the aforementioned Vampire Diaries. Wow, that's awkward.

One last thing, just to make this random post truly random: I learned in Planning class today that teenagers need exactly nine hours and twenty minutes of sleep to be properly rested. So, don't you be staying up too late!

Don't worry Damon, I still love you. Even if you can be totally psycho.

"I do believe in killing the messenger. Know why? It sends a message." - Damon Salvatore

Thursday has been a bit random. Not bad, just... random.

Love,

Erika

visual inspiration

I was reading a blog post by the lovely Steph Bowe and have decided to follow her lead--I'm going to post about visual inspiration! Pictures and photos are a huge inspiration to me. I like to be able to see what my characters look like, and am always on the hunt for good picts. All of the following images are from We Heart It (actually, I stole one from Caitlin's blog!) and are my inspiration for my current WIP:















Oh my gosh, I have a lot of pictures. Anyways, feel free to take any you like, and make your own post on visual inspiration. I love seeing all these pretty pictures :)

Erika

number two pencil

Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, oh my gosh.

Today was the first day of school. My first day of tenth grade. The first time I heard my science teacher's Yoda impersonation.

I've never dreaded the first day of school. I always feel more anxious than anything. Last night I couldn't sleep, and when I woke up at seven AM this morning, I barely made it to the shower without collapsing.

My classes this semester?

Planning - We're going to be focusing on our future career plans, nutrition, and budgets. Fun stuff. Minus the fact that I have no real career plans, I already know a weird amount of information about nutrition (seriously. Want a good source of polyunsaturated fat? Eat some salmon), and my version of a budget is the cow-shaped-piggy-bank on my desk.

English - English, English, English. This makes me happy. And I have it with a boy I was friends with when we were, like, six years old. That makes me happy. However, we're starting with a unit on essays. Slightly less fun.

Art - Eek! I'm extremely thrilled to have Art class for a whole semester (half the school year). And I have it with two of my good friends. So stoked for our pottery unit :)

Band/Science - We have band all year round, paired with an academic course. I play trumpet. I am very excited. I need to stop using "I" statements.

My semester looks pretty fun--but that means, starting in February, I have all the crazy hard academic classes. Woo-hoo.

My friend K and I stayed late after school (so late that our science/home room teacher was like, "Get out of here!" In a joking way... I think) decorating our lockers. I love putting pictures up in my locker, even though I have a stupid bottom locker (meaning I need to kneel down on the ground and jostle elbows with my "neighbors" every time I need to get my books). I get to decide what I want to look at for the coming year--what will inspire me or make me laugh.

As of today, I'll get to stare at Finn from Glee (AKA Cory Monteith)'s face every time I open my locker. I've got to be honest, I'm pretty excited :D


Love,

Erika

500 Books of Summer

School starts tomorrow. I have less than twenty-four hours of summer left and, rather than partying it up, I've pretty much resigned myself to staying home, being dull. I'm sick, I didn't sleep well, and I need to clean my room or my dad will cut off my pinkie toes (not really, I was just trying to think of some kind of horrible torture).

I've been waiting for a while to talk about my favorite books of summer, so here goes. I could've sworn I read more, but I suck at reading. Really, I can't read more than one book at a time or I completely forget what's going on--and I'm picky :P

500 Books of Summer (okay, more like ten):

1. Porcupine by Meg Tilly - MG Contemporary - She was in Fame and I MET HER! Such a cool person, and this book was bursting with voice, but the chapters--or lack thereof; the book was arranged by seasons--were a little confusing.

2. The Gryphon Project by Carrie Mac - YA Urban Fantasy - I'm not really sure what genre this fits in, but I loved the idea of a society where people have more than one life--and the amount of lives you have determines your class. I actually read this as an ARC I got from work. It was a good story, but I felt like it fell flat at some points, despite the interesting characters.

3. Along for the Ride by Sarah Dessen - YA Contemporary - This was my first experience reading anything by Sarah Dessen. I loved how the MC's parents were really well defined characters, but it was a bit too wholesome and good hearted for my taste ;)

4. Lock and Key by Sarah Dessen - YA Contemporary - I didn't like this book. I just couldn't connect with the main character, and, as well written as it was, I felt like there were things that could have been left out.

5. Dead Tossed Waves by Carrie Ryan - YA Dystopian - Is this Dystopian? I wasn't sure if YA Zombie counted as a genre, but it definitely should, and Carrie Ryan can be the poster child. I am legitimately terrified of zombies, but I liked this book, and I liked how much it scared me.
But I found myself at odds with the MC some times, and wishing a few lines had been left out.

6. Shiver and Linger by Maggie Stiefvater - YA Urban Fantasy - I absolutely loved Shiver. One of the main characters, Sam, is so poetic and vulnerable, I couldn't wait to read his chapters--and it kept me on the edge of my seat. In Linger, I really liked the contrast of Cole and Isobel's voices, but I didn't have the same sense of urgency as in Shiver--until the end, that is.

7. The Darkest Powers trilogy by Kelley Armstrong - YA Urban Fantasy - Definitely one of my favorite reads this summer. I loved the main character and the fact that she wasn't all, "Woo-hoo, magic!" right away. She had to adjust to the idea of having 'powers' just like any other person would.

8. Break by Hannah Moskowitz - YA Contemporary - I liked this book, but at times I had a hard time connecting to it. Still, a great, realistic read with dialogue that made me laugh out loud several times.

9. Mockingjay by Suzanne Colins - YA Dystopian - OMGWOW. This book was the perfect way to end the Hunger Games trilogy (for the record, the first book was my favorite), and my friend and I have been discussing it in whispers every time we see each other.

10. The Demon's Lexicon by Sarah Rees Brennan - YA Urban Fantasy - Again, I suck at determining genres, but oh well. I'm not done this yet, but I love it already. And I wanted this list to be an even ten. I love Nick's dialogue, and all of the characters, and I feel like there's just enough internal monologue to give the story dimension without slowing down the pace.

This summer, I also had my first experience Beta Reading! I beta-read and line-edited Someone Left to Love by the lovely and patient Dana-Lynn Mauldin. It was a nice read, very emotional, and very well written. I can't wait to see it published :)

All in all, I really need to read more. Maybe the rainy days of Fall will inspire me. So, what are your books of summer?

Love,

Erika

I me you we

bSoundtrack: Uh, I'm watching "Camp Rock 2"... Yeah.
Words: +2500 in a strange spurt of inspiration

When I was starting high school, I had to go to a workshop for teen girls (I'm pretty sure everyone in our grade had to attend--I don't even know why, it was just mandatory). It was supposed to help girls talk about and work through their "issues". Or something.

One of the main things they talked about at the workshop was body image. The instructors had us each read one line from a poem called something like, "I Am Me." It was all about accepting yourself as who you are--your good points, talents, attractive qualities, and all the bad stuff, too.

The end of the poem is the only part I really remember:

"I am me. And I am okay."

When it was done and everyone was clapping awkwardly and shooting each other weird looks, I was sitting their with a stupid smile plastered on my face, thinking "Bullshit."

Body image is a huge issue for a lot of people--girls and boys, women and men. And so many people sell themselves short.

Some of my friends go on and on, talking down about how they look, what they wear, who they are. I'm no shining example, nor do I claim to be, but I don't think that talking yourself down is any way to treat a person. You wouldn't look at a complete stranger and say, "You're ugly," so how can you possibly do that when you look in a mirror? It's disrespectful.

I know I'm generalizing. Not everyone hates how they look--a lot of people love their bodies, their minds, their personalities (though not necessarily in that order). I think a lot of writers make this generalization, as well. Everyone deals with self confidence problems, but a confident character here or there can be a nice change.

I don't mean you should walk around saying, "I'm awesome, I'm the best, I win at life." That doesn't make you awesome, that just makes you a jerk.

I think it's finding the balance that's key. You can't be self-absorbed, in a good or bad way. But next time you're looking in a mirror, try this line instead:

I am me and I am fantastic. Beautiful. Unique. Talented. Extraordinary. Brilliant. Lovely just the way I am.

Because you are.

Love,

Erika

PS: I don't meant to get all motivational-speaker on you. I just had something on my mind.

and this

So this...

“I hear voices,” I say, stopping abruptly.

He whirls around, face totally blank, and says, “And I see dead people—face it, Emilia, you’re not the only one eligible for fucked-up-citizen-of-the-year award.”

...Is the only line I have written for a story that I sort of want to write. It's about a fountain. I know, lame, right? Whatever. I guess I have a thing for water features.

asdfjkl;

Erika

to be read

What are you reading these days?

Ever since I started working at a bookstore, my to-be-read pile has grown exponentially. Yesterday, someone actually bought my staff recommendation! It was fantastic! (And it was On the Jellicoe Road by Melina Marchetta, one of my all time favorite books.)

I'm currently reading The Demon's Lexicon by Sarah Rees Brennan, review soon to come (and this time I mean it!).

My To Be Read pile is looking a little like this:

1. Looking for Alaska by John Green - I've started this book twice and still haven't gotten through it. I know it's an amazing poster child for YA, and there are parts of it that I love, but I really haven't gotten into it.

2. Paranormalcy by Kiersten White - I ordered this through the store and it arrived yesterday. I can't wait to read it! All the reviews online make it sound absolutely fantastic.

3. Harry Potter by JK Rowling - I'm determined to re-read this series, starting from book one. I have read all seven Harry Potter books, but only once. I don't know why.

4. Looking for Alibrandi by Melina Marchetta - I found this in a used bookstore and did a little dance that seriously freaked out all the employees. So excited to read this!

5. My Name is Memory by Ann Brashares - A few of my friends have read this, and they all say it's really awesome. I'm a big Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants fan :)

6. Beautiful Creatures by Kami Garcia and Margaret Stohl - Again, I've heard a lot of fantastic reviews of this book, and the cover looks so fancy and cool! (Exhibit A to the left.)

7. The History of Love by Nicole Krauss - I read the first few pages while I was putting some books away and it sounds really cool.

So, what's on your book list? Do you have any suggestions for reading material on windy fall days (like today--there's some blue sky in the distance, but I refuse to let it get me down)?

Love,

Erika