band jokes

I've been playing the trumpet for almost five years. I love taking a deep breath, putting the cool metal to my lips, and making some noise. For the love of all things noisy, band-related and at least slightly musical, here are some bad-but-good band jokes for you:

Q: What do you call someone who hangs around with musicians?
A: A drummer.

Q: How many euphonium players does it take to change a light bulb?
A: What the heck is a euphonium?

Q: How many conductors does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Only one, but then again, who's really watching?

Q: What's the difference between a basoon and a trampoline?
A: You take your shoes off to jump on the trampoline!

Q: What's the definition of a gentleman?
A: Someone who knows how to play the trumpet and doesn't.

Q: Why did Mozart kill his chickens?
A: Because they always ran around screaming, "Bach! Bach! Bach!"

What about you--do you play any instruments? Were you ever in a band, concert or otherwise?